“You cannot protect yourself from sadness without protecting yourself from happiness.”
– Jonathan Safran Foer, author “Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close” (2005)
“Most things in life are neither good nor bad, right nor wrong. Most things just are.”
– Dr. Tom Graf, old friend and spectacular psychologist
Safety sounds so, well, “safe,” doesn’t it?
And sometimes, safe is good. When there is real danger, for example. Or better, stated, when there is imminent real danger.
Other times, maybe safety makes us numb. Ever tried to tie your shoe when your hand was asleep? Or reach for that alarm when you’d been laying on your arm wrong and it’s all tingly? You know, when your brain is sending nimble signals to your fingers, and you hand is interpreting them as if the instructions were to club the alarm clock in to submssion? Numbness, unless we’re in the dentist’s chair, is rarely our friend.
If we shut down every time there’s a risk involved, it’s likely that we’re also shutting down every time there’s a significant gain possible, because there ain’t much worth having that doesn’t come with some risk. If we’re shutting down and choosing numbness can you blame folks if they look at us and worry that it’s “dumbness,” instead? If we’re dead to the thrill of victory, at what point do we just stop engaging in the game? In that context, how “safe” does self-induced numbness sound?
How much easier is it to make a difference when we’re fully engaged and alive? Let’s promise ourselves we won’t try to protect against the moments that make us the most alive!
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