“Never ask, “Can I do this?” Ask, “How can I do this?”
– Dan Zadra, author, in his book Five, a gift from my sister a few Christmas’ ago
Zadra’s book may appear long of “fluff,” but you could also argue that Zig Ziglar drove a pretty good career with “fluff.” And, not only is the book a good “checkup-from-the-neck-up” (thanks, Zig!) it is candidly refreshing and fun to dip in to from time to time.
It’s less about the “fluff” than it is to determine how much substance we can bake in to that soft stuff.
Every great coach balances the sound bites — the reminders of the “cause” or the rallying cry — with the repetition and practice that produces positive responses when the game is on. It’s important to have both, because one makes it simple and clear and the other makes it likely.
The difference between “Can I…?” and “HOW can I…?” gets us dealing in stronger likelihoods.
Just as The Heston Group believes we first have to understand “Why?” the focus on “How” leads us into the realm of possibility thinking. It becomes less about whether and more about when.
Last, but not least, if we close our eyes and picture someone asking “Can I…?” and then picture the same person asking, “HOW can I…?” it’s pretty easy to tell which person we’d rather hang around with, work with and be attached to.
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